james_nicoll ([info]james_nicoll) wrote,
@ 2007-02-13 14:12:00
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SPIDER-MAN: REIGN #3
Please tell me that what I am reading on various sites about what killed Mary Jane Watson in this series is a vast internet conspiracy at my expense and that

spoilers



Marvel did not suddenly decide that Death by Radioactive Spiderman Sperm was a good idea.

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[info]julesjones
2007-02-13 07:25 pm UTC (link)
"Man of Steel, Woman of Kleenex!" :-)

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[info]mjlayman
2007-02-13 11:34 pm UTC (link)
"The Superman Sex Boogie!"

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[info]jack_ryder
2007-02-13 07:25 pm UTC (link)
Marvel did not suddenly decide that Death by Radioactive Spiderman Sperm was a good idea.

No, it took several committees.

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[info]james_nicoll
2007-02-13 07:28 pm UTC (link)
I hope at the very least Marvel ran condom ads in that issue.

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[info]knotty_pine
2007-02-13 07:29 pm UTC (link)
James, you are in danger of destroying my remaining sanity.

You have _got_ to be kidding. Right?

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[info]james_nicoll
2007-02-13 07:55 pm UTC (link)
"Like a spider, crawling up inside your body and laying a thousand eggs of cancer... I killed you."

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[info]knotty_pine
2007-02-13 08:02 pm UTC (link)
Well, there goes any remaining respect I had for Marvel.

I'll just be over in the corner, gibbering sadly to myself about lost childhood.

(Reply to this) (Parent)(Thread)

[info]mishalak
2007-02-13 09:56 pm UTC (link)
Well it is a far future type thingy. Like Dark Knight Returns and just as badly written. Just ignore it and it will go away eventually.

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[info]mrteufel
2007-02-13 11:59 pm UTC (link)
Thank [deity] for that! After the car-crash of Civil War* I was afraid this might be cannon!

*The basic premise of Civil War had potential. The execution has been crap.

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[info]arielstarshadow
2007-02-14 01:10 pm UTC (link)
I can feel bits of my sanity draining away...

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[info]thesaucernews
2007-02-13 07:52 pm UTC (link)
Death might have been preferable to the possibility of hundreds of Peter's tiny, mutant, arachnoid love-bugs crawling around inside her womb....

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[info]dragovianknight
2007-02-13 07:55 pm UTC (link)
And once again, the internet reduces me to helplessly repeating, "What?"

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[info]james_nicoll
2007-02-13 08:03 pm UTC (link)
At least with Julius Schwartz, I could understand the logic he was using. This reduces me to baffled mumbling.

I sure hope this doesn't lead to Peter running around New York in crotchless pants, armed with a porn magazine and a big tube of lube, threatening villains with his RADIOACTIVE SPERM OF DEATH!

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[info]james_nicoll
2007-02-13 08:06 pm UTC (link)
"That's not ... webbing ..., is it?"

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[info]rysmiel
2007-02-13 08:20 pm UTC (link)
I have a feeling I've asked this before, but have you read Marshal Law Takes Manhattan ? The Spiderman-equivalent in that takes the "adolescent boy discovers weird white sticky stuff squirting from unexpected places on his body" connection and hammers it into the ground and then several metres further down.

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[info]james_nicoll
2007-02-13 08:33 pm UTC (link)
Yeah, I think I did. I was never a bit MARSHALL LAW fan, though.

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[info]erastes
2007-02-13 09:21 pm UTC (link)
*dies of the giggles*

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[info]dragovianknight
2007-02-13 08:09 pm UTC (link)
Hey, if they thought they could get away with selling it, I'm sure they'd do it.

(Reply to this) (Parent)

[info]julesjones
2007-02-13 08:25 pm UTC (link)
Must... resist...the plot bunny...

(Reply to this) (Parent)

[info]stevendj
2007-02-13 09:12 pm UTC (link)
Now every time a supervillain comes down with cancer, his buddies will recoil in horror and disgust.

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[info]ckd
2007-02-13 09:25 pm UTC (link)
Especially if it's throat and/or prostate cancer....

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[info]missychacha
2007-02-15 09:43 pm UTC (link)
bwhahahahaa

(Reply to this) (Parent)

[info]elynne
2007-02-13 08:01 pm UTC (link)
*hahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHA* oh my god SO WRONG. :D

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[info]burger_eater
2007-02-13 08:19 pm UTC (link)
See for yourself.

Link found via [info]bookslut.

What's getting glossed over, apparently, is that while Peter Parker is monologing about his anguish over his nuclear jizz, MJ's cancer-ridden corpse is attacking him with a super-long demon tongue and fangs.

And apparently, she bites off his tongue.

Which doesn't stop his monologing.

Because that's just another day at the office in comic world.

(Reply to this) (Thread)

[info]rysmiel
2007-02-13 08:22 pm UTC (link)
Marvel haven't actually responded to those [info]mightygodking parodies James has been linking to by hiring him when nobody was looking or anything ?

*shudder*

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[info]morchades
2007-02-13 11:51 pm UTC (link)
I've been collecting these links for one big linkpost, but I will NOT follow that one.

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[info]lederhosen
2007-02-13 11:56 pm UTC (link)
Looking at that, I think somebody muddled "Ragnarok" with "anorak", which is oddly apropos.

(Reply to this) (Parent)

[info]logrusboy
2007-02-13 08:25 pm UTC (link)
My esteemed (but usenetishly insignificant) [info]james_nicoll,

Were it not bad enough that you have shared the latest evil Marvel expects us to swallow (oops, did I type that?), your comments reveal you to be an extraordinarily bad, bad man who should be punished severely.

Accordingly, please expect Mistress Olga's visit this evening. Hopefully, you will learn your lesson from this experience.

Best regards,

[info]logrusboy

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[info]mmcirvin
2007-02-13 11:29 pm UTC (link)
Happy Valentine's Day.

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[info]mrteufel
2007-02-14 12:01 am UTC (link)
BWahahahahahhahahaah!

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[info]paraleipsis
2007-02-14 02:14 am UTC (link)
*diez*

(Reply to this) (Parent)

[info]roseembolism
2007-02-14 08:14 pm UTC (link)
So I guess we get a new spidey theme song...

"Spider sperm, spider sperm
Gives ya cancer that spider sperm"

(Reply to this) (Thread)

[info]the_nita
2007-02-15 02:20 am UTC (link)
"Can he thrust, deep inside?
Takes his wife for a cancerous ride, hey hey
There goes the spider sperm..."

(Reply to this) (Parent)

[info]sargent
2007-02-15 10:17 pm UTC (link)
If that's the case, I'd hate to be the guy who used the same washing machine right after Peter was done with his sheets.

(Reply to this) (Thread)
for the doubters....
(Anonymous)
2007-02-22 07:38 pm UTC (link)
links to page 11 and 12 of reign #3 for those in disbelief.
http://img2.freeimagehosting.net/uploads/624aacea89.jpg
http://img2.freeimagehosting.net/uploads/7aeed97eb1.jpg

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