james_nicoll

dodgy looking massage parlours in my neighbourhood

Not to mention owning the Euro cafe around the corner from you?

The Euro's been around for ages, though. For some reason I got the impression that he was a recent arrival on the KW scene. The dodgy massage parlours in question popped up in the last few years [1].

I did wonder if he knew the xYugoslavian who took a shot at one of my customers back in the 1990s. The customer tried to pass the shooter on the 401, which the shooter assumed meant that the customer must be a damn dirty (one of the Yugolslavian ethnic groups the shooter wasn't), which could only be dealt with by blazing away inaccurately with a handgun before fleeing home and then trying to frame the shooter's kid for the incident.

1: There were others in the 1990s, ones that got into a dispute with the City. The rather conservative Indian businessman who owned the laundry I used to use went to bat for them on the grounds that if the City was allowed to suddenly change the rules for one set of businesses, they could do it to any business.

By an odd coincidence, the city scheduled road repairs that cut off all access to that laundrette about that time.

He also catered to the stripper and (I think) hooker trade at his laundrette on the grounds that nobody's lives are improved by having dirty clothes.

Once again I am annoyed that while one can make death threats and be nabbed with drugs without getting deported, all it took to get my old man evicted from Canada was having the wrong relatives in the USA.

Ah, well. The people who made that decision are no doubt mostly dead and a third of them will have died of cancer.

Meanwhile, a friend of mine in China can't get a tourist visa for Canada, because the government thinks she'll give up her high-paid professional job to work as an illegal dishwasher.

That's the Canadian government. The Chinese government is quite OK with her having an overseas holiday.

I think someone I know has been to the massage parlour by your place--the one in the plaza, as opposed to one on Queen Street. I know I've heard the practitioner there described in uncomplimentary terms, which do not bear repeating.

The strange zoning bylaws that restrict strip clubs are also, well, evidence of the city's confused laws. Years ago, I heard from an employee at a sex toys store that she had never seen a town where butt plugs went off the shelves so fast....

This describes Kitchener perfectly, to me.

There's a new dodgy massage place on Queen but the other one looks like it might have gone under.

Ah, the wacky hijinks that ensued when City Hall tried to make it possible to allow the Center in the Square to do some show with nudity without allowing the rest of us to dissolve into a vast sea of rampant hedonism. I remember at one point they came up with list of things shows couldn't do, one of which was "Jell-O wrestling". As it turns out, General Foods does not recognize the sport of Jell-O Wrestling as a valid use of their product's name and they had lawyers deployed in less than a day after the creation of that list.

In Kitchener's defense, at least we don't have a by-law banning the private ownership of blue whales.

I bet he's a Mall Ninja!

This prompted me to do a Google search for "dodgy massage parlour near: kitchener on"

Amusingly enough, the number two match was the University of Guelph.

It's like the woman who set up Max Mosley's nazi-chic domme thrashing, whose husband turned out to be an MI5 agent; the same kind of people are attracted to both trades.